Last week for Spring Break we went to this more-than-marvelous beach for a couple of days called Fronton. Doulos takes our 6th and 10th graders there to study about the coral reef and lobster habitats. I have heard great things about it, so we HAD to go. [See next blog post for pics. Trust me you will want to see them Paradide I tell you.]
All along the beach there there is what we like to call "sea glass." We, mostly the Americans who visit, are obsessed with it. Basically it is just broken Presidente bottles, or other alcoholic beverage bottles that get tossed in the ocean. Then it spends a little time in the ocean getting all roughed up, and then we pick it up and find that its the most beautiful thing we've ever seen. I am convinced that the locals that live there break the bottles on purpose and then watch us from afar laughing it up and wondering why in the world we collect this trash. But let's be honest it's not my first time to collect trash from the side of the road hoping to create something. But that's another story.
As I was collected I couldn't help but think how perfect the sea glass was. I didn't care if I was crazy. I love this stuff and can't wait to make some sweet jewelry. I felt like as I was walking up and down the beach collecting it, God said,
"Hey Leah, this is YOU. This is exactly how I desire you to be. Broken."
I thought about it, and said, "well of course you want me broken. I know that. I know you will give us hard times. Blah. Blah. Blah." But as I continued walking and collecting, I noticed that I only picked up the ones that were REALLY roughed up. I threw back the ones that still had some sharp edges, and said, "they're just not ready yet." I wanted them to really spend some time rolling around on the bottom of the ocean, getting beat up by rocks, waves, coral, sand. THEN I wanted them. Then it dawned on me.
This IS how God desires my heart. He wants it to get pushed around by the waves, get messed up, roughed up, scratched up for quite some time. The more I am rolled around, the more beautiful I become in His eyes. He will be with me every moment of it. And one day, He will come along the beach, pick me up and say,
"The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God." Psalms 51:17